THE ZEN OF SELFIES.

My first title for this post was going to be "Miserable Selfies."  Because so many selfie-sketches (as opposed to selfie-photos, where everyone is consciously smiling) make the artist look grim.  But the fact is, I am so far from miserable it's funny.  I'm actually incredibly happy.

Oh yeah?  Then why do I look so miserable?

Such a good question...I look at a lot of sketching and visual journal websites and I often notice how totally grumpy everyone looks in their hand-drawn selfies.  People who don't draw often see these and complain, "But you look so unhappy!  I never see you looking that way."

No, actually, what one usually sees in selfie-sketches is a face devoid of any type of expression at all, and that often makes the artist look entirely miserable--because we just aren't used to seeing others with no expression.  Think about taking the subway; you often see expressionless people there, and they can look quite miserable (they might be, on a crowded subway), but in fact, we have no idea about their interior states.

In fact, I was in a state of delight drawing this.  Not that you can tell!  But it has been months, perhaps over a year, since I've spent more than a minute drawing anything representational.  This hardly qualifies as a great piece of art; I'm too out of practice and I don't pretend to be a great artist even when I have been practicing.  I know I have a lot to learn.  I did this on a post-it with a ballpoint pen, in about 5 minutes.  When I finished, I looked at it and felt GREAT.  It was so much fun to do!  Even if it closely resembles a mug shot. 

And it does resemble a mug shot--it appears someone has just slugged me in the jaw and knocked my mouth off-center so that it has settled under one nostril rather than being balanced between the two.  (I hope that isn't true in real life)  And what happened to the nose, which is also migrating to one side of my face and looks vastly white?

Perhaps the cubists were onto something, when you look at that face.  Ha.

I DON'T CARE.  The point is, I did it.  I drew something and I had so much fun doing it.  It felt great.

Practice at selfies does allow one to eventually add expression to the face.  (Check out Rembrandt's selfies or Frida Kahlo's selfies to see masters at work.)  But you know?...this actually WAS my expression while I was drawing, because I was totally in the present moment, totally focused, totally absorbed, and not thinking of anything else.

So I may look miserable, but I am happy, happy, happy with my tiny drawing.  I feel more practice sessions hurtling in my direction.

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The daily small painting, a small resource and time commitment, is an exercise in absolute focus for that time period. It's like a meditation, really.
- Gaye Adams