I could have titled this post:
What I noticed today, as I really dig in to this new piece, is the initial curiosity, restlessness, and insecurity of beginnings. Oh sure, I liked my design on paper, where it looked so neat and tidy. But in actually starting to produce the design in wool on monks cloth, I feel all the questions and doubts rushing forward. Will I have enough yarn? I don't know. Did I choose the right colors? I don't know. Will the new techniques I want to use actually work? I don't know. Will unfamiliar yarns/fabrics/techniques add to or subtract from the effect? I don't know. Can I really mix those two fibers in the needle? I don't know. Does everyone create this level of utter chaos when working on something new? I don't know. Can I tolerate the mess everywhere, while I get this underway? I don't know. Am I doing this right? I don't know. ...and on and on. I found myself taking frequent breaks from the work. Reading a book to distract myself. Going onto Facebook. Knitting. Running errands. Taking a nap. Avoid, avoid, avoid. It is very hard to tolerate this level of "I-don't-know-ness." I notice it every time I start something new. And yet...there is something exciting about it as well. The novelty, the experimentation, the not-knowing if something is going to work, and when it doesn't work, the part where I figure out what will work. I hope. Truth is, I don't know. Comments are closed.
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ABOUT ME I'm a textile artist (traditional rug hooking, punch needle rug hooking, and other textile arts), a long-time meditator, a certified meditation teacher and coach, and focused on learning about the interplay of art, creativity, and mindfulness every day. Certified Unified Mindfulness Coach Level I, 2024
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