This tangle is just too much darned fun to draw! Once again it went somewhere I couldn't have imagined.
The Connection Between Zentangle and Traditional Meditation: I enjoy the way that Zentangle® and my other meditation practice regularly take me where I hadn't expected to go. There's a nice article in Psychology Today magazine on why Zentangle is so meditative HERE. If you have ever wanted to meditate, but feel that you can't because "my mind just won't stop!" you are experiencing the #1 fallacy about meditation--that the mind should, or will, stop thinking. It's the job of the mind to think! It is certainly not going to stop for meditation...but with experience, you may find that you notice some quieter spaces or times when your thoughts seem to be running on "dim" in the background. So don't let your noisy mind stop YOU because IT won't stop. Just the fact that you are noticing the noise is a very good sign--you are not "doing it wrong," you are, in fact, doing it right. Why am I bringing this up? Because Zentangle is a form of moving meditation, and often people find it easier to begin with something along those lines rather than plunging into formal meditation. And you do not need any art talent at all to learn to tangle. NONE. Yes, that is true. If you can sign your name, you can tangle. What you'll find as you're tangling is: Focus. Attention. Silence. Slowing down. You will even learn to tolerate and handle mistakes; you'll learn not to judge something in the very moment you are creating it, but to stand back and evaluate later. You'll learn patience--although you will need a lot less of this than you might assume. You'll be loving the results--but even more, you will truly love the process. Gee, that sounds like a lot of learning. But surprisingly, it comes without effort. You'll be so focused on the pleasurable process of drawing lines that you won't even notice what you've learned until later. And--you'll be learning about meditation in that same effortless way. To find a teacher, just go to the main Zentangle website HERE and look for their list of Certified Zentangle Teachers (also known as "CZTs"). There's a good chance you will find a CZT neaby. Have fun! Continuing on today with my drawing meditation (aka Zentangle®). I began tangling my journal cover last night. At first I thought I was done. Here is the first version. Don't ask me to name all those tangles off the top of my head. I used a Micron 01 black, graphite, and a white chalk pencil on this. But I knew I would need to seal the cover somehow. Otherwise, the two pencils (white and black) would smudge and wear off. So today I dug out the Mod Podge for Paper, since I wasn't sure what else to use. Meanwhile, in meditation this morning, it came to me that I wanted to add a tangle (created by me, no name yet) on the right hand part of the cover. So I did. Then I put 3 layers of Mod Podge on the cover, waiting at least a half hour between each. I hope this works! It seems duller (I used Matte Mod Podge) but then I also photographed it in a different light from yesterday, so it's hard to tell. Here's the finished journal cover. Yup, big difference in light as the teal color on the binding of the first photo is accurate and it looks brown here. I think I like this. So tonight I finished off the day with this tangle on the theme of "Striping." I also did my usual silent meditation practice today, but I am always reminded, after a long session of tangling, how similar these two meditative practices are. They are each so calming. So grateful to have found Zentangle all those years ago, and to the truly wonderful people who teach it as a meditative practice. Thank you.
I've gotten back into continuous line drawing, which results in curious, wonky images and is enormous fun to do. It's also very easy to slip into the zone (meditate) while doing it, as it calls for careful attention to the object being drawn--while never lifting your pen from the page.
This wonky Buddha was drawn from a clay wall decoration. I am enjoying the way his uma (the dot on the his forehead) has migrated over to one side. I never know how these drawings will turn out; all of this was done without ever lifting my pen, as one very long line, retracing along itself when I needed to move to another area. Try it yourself--it's great fun and the results are always surprising and often humorous. Somewhat like meditation. This is a photo of a spirit rock. No, it doesn't refer to the remarkable meditation center in California. But it certainly it relates to meditation. A dear friend made it, covering the tiny stone with her hand-netting and adding those tiny beads She gave it to me as a housewarming gift. Both of us know that doing this kind of work is highly meditative--it's why I'm so drawn to art at this point in my life, along with a daily meditation practice. Stones have always held a lot of symbolism for me, especially river rocks with their smooth round shapes and heft. They are symbols of wholeness, endurance, and comfort. I will enjoy this sweet gift for a long time. It is so lovely to connect with much-valued old friends. "A rugged stone grows smooth from hand to hand." --George Herbert "Our lives are unique stones in the mosaic of human experience--priceless and irreplaceable." --Henri J.M. Nouwen Meanwhile, I cannot decide if I'm enjoying the "sketching and watercolor" course or not. I'm a bit puzzled by why I'm having so much trouble with the watercolor and specifically with the brush (watercolor brush). If it weren't the 2nd brush I've tried--with similar issues--I'd say the brush is leaking. Too much water swishing around, and you can see it's leaking outside the bounds of the apple (yes, apple...not a tomato) above. I could go on and on, but I won't. Let's just say I haven't had this experience before, not that I've had much experience at all. I'll keep going with this and see what happens. It's tough not to just grab my colored pencils, though. In watercolor, if you are not in trouble, then you're in trouble. --Selma Blackburn In watercolour, particularly, it's almost always better to chuck than fix. --Joe Joseph P. Blodgett ...Really? Guess I'll find out. I hope you will take a careful look at the above piece. It's made from 28 triangular tiles placed together. Each tile is unique, and was tangled by my good friend AE. The overall effect is stunning. And, they can all be moved around easily for a completely different look. Take another moment to look at each individual triangle and you'll see the level of creativity at work here. * * * This afternoon I returned from spending five days with AE.. She's been dealing with a particularly challenging and confusing illness for months now, and coincidentally (or was it...?), she learned Zentangle right around the time that the illness announced itself. For the last several weeks she has been receiving intensive and intrusive treatments, and I can't emphasize how often she has mentioned that tangling has enabled her to cope. And while coping, she has been producing these mini-beauties. Here are a few more examples (with thanks to her for letting me post these): The meditative nature of Zentangle has been extremely helpful while she has been in treatment. Tiles are the perfect size for portability and for tangling while waiting to be seen in a doctor's office. One of the things I truly love about tangling is that it is a form of moving meditation, and enables a person to focus completely on the present, line by line, and not get caught up in past or future. This is a huge advantage if you are waiting for a treatment session, a doctor's appointment or any stressful situation. AE has been making the best of her time, as you can see here. * * * We have known each other for almost 40 years (how the hell did that happen?) and have a lot of shared interests. We met while pursuing a particular spiritual tradition and soon discovered a mutual love of art and crafts. For years we both did bead work (she focused on loom work, I focused on bead embroidery) and between us we accrued enough beads to open a bead store. Not that that was our intention; as we are both "tool hoarders," we never considered selling our stock and each still have pounds of seed beads. We are constant knitters and each have huge yarn stashes. We both enjoy writing and have blogs; she has also written a novel. We've each accumulated way too many art supplies. We each meditate daily. We both read constantly, and our home libraries have many similar books. I wouldn't even want to speculate about how many books each of our homes contain...too many. I have to laugh at the similarities--we are each hopelessly determined and obsessive in pursuing our interests. In just a few short months, she's produced as many tangles as I have in all the years I've been tangling. She has taken her tangling kit to every doctor's appointment and treatment session, and used that time well. It's an honor to share some of her work here. And yet we are also very different, something I also enjoy. I value our discussions, whether we are agreeing or disagreeing. I am fortunate to have her as a friend, and hope we continue our crazy, obscure, satisfying interests for years to come. She is kind, resilient, talented, hilarious and courageous. A gift in my life. "Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down."
– Oprah Winfrey "There is nothing better than a friend, unless it is a friend with chocolate." ― Linda Grayson Talk about a dramatic year. And it still has over three months to go. I know I'm not the only one dealing with drama; Americans in general have their hands full with WAY too much drama at the moment--and given who is in the White House, it's bound to accelerate. And alas, our drama tends to become the world's drama. However, this isn't a post about politics. So far this year for me:
I'm feeling concerned and hopeful for my dear friends, all of them--near and far. Feeling impatient to get on with my altered life here. Feeling concerned about the political scene locally and globally. Feeling more concerned than ever about our fragile, beautiful planet. If I weren't meditating daily...well, I don't want to think about it. May we be safe. May we be healthy. May we find peace, and find compassion for each other. May we grow kinder. May we care for our mother, the Earth. Trying to arrange for some work to be done in my kitchen, I had given a local contractor nine dates to choose from. He chose today, the last date I gave him, saying he'd be here "after lunch." I didn't have much hope, I will admit, as I've had a bad experience with him in the past. Using him was not my choice--he's the contractor the company uses for its installations. Of course, it's now 7 pm and despite my calling him around 3 pm (voicemail), he didn't show up and hasn't contacted me. Good thing I am reading the following book, which I am thoroughly enjoying: I am loving this book--although not sure I agree with all of it, but it is a lot to take in. It's very well written and funny. And yet...I wish he had not used the word "true," in the title, which smacks of dogmatism to me. Probably a reflection of my upbringing, but it makes me uneasy.
Anyway, it was no coincidence that I was reading this today. We've all heard of Sylvia Plath, famous for her extraordinary poetry, fascinating life, and tragic suicide. But who knew she was also a visual artist? I certainly didn't. Check out this fascinating article from one of my favorite websites called Brain Pickings. Plath was a visual artist as well as a phenomenal poet. I wish I could post some of those photographs here, but I haven't asked permission, so instead I will direct you to the site of the article where you can see them in all their glory. Meanwhile, my damaged hand is continuing to respond to intense exercise. It hurts like hell most of the time but it's finally beginning to act like a hand again. (At least it isn't my dominant hand--and for that piece of luck, I am eternally grateful.) I've been able to tangle a bit more. Here's a recent piece and how it evolved. The first stage, lines in progress: Next, here is the piece with the line work done, but without any shading: And below is the finished piece on the actual journal page, after shading: This was so much fun to draw, as it was simply line after line after line, each one drawn slowly and deliberately. A meditation in motion.
Another insomniac night produced this in my Zentangle® Pre-Strung Journal that's near the bed. I was too lazy to get up and find my colored pencils so used only the Rainbow Lead Pencil. Many of the pre-drawn strings in this journal slide right off the page, as this one does. I love the way Zentangle regularly breaks all the rules. I am currently reading Tara Brach's extraordinary book, Radical Acceptance, and have been thinking about acceptance in relationships. Note that "acceptance" does not necessarily indicate "agreement with," but rather is an acknowledgement of exactly what is happening--before any action is chosen. In other words, not blindly reacting, but instead seeing the situation clearly and then perhaps being able to choose a wise action rather than going with the first impulse. I've been bringing these ideas into meditation and learning from them. In a world gone mad with angry, hostile relationships, full of trolls and bullies, there has never been more need for being able to see clearly and choose one's reaction wisely. This carried over into my tangling, as I found myself starting with the tangle Betweed and then thinking about similarities between Betweed and Mooka, which is what I was playing with here. ...after which I slept quite well, even if not long! Everything in life that we really accept undergoes a change.
--Katherine Mansfield Accept - then act. Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it. Always work with it, not against it. --Eckhart Tolle Oh my gawd. Who knew that I would be taking a five-month sabbatical from blogging? I knew I would have to stop for awhile, but never thought it would be this long. Little did I know that UN-packing on the other side of the move would take so much longer than the packing ever did. I moved in late March, and I am still nowhere near ready to call myself settled. In fact, I can declare myself un-settled. Very unsettled indeed, on a number of levels. I am confident that it will all come right in the end, but in this transition things have often felt very broken. The absence of time to make art has been a major contributor to that. I still do not have either the space or the time to draw, tangle, or hook/punch rugs. I've had down days for sure--but I am making progress and once I sort out some of the remaining unpacking challenges, I'll be in good shape. In all of the boxes I've unpacked, I've only noticed three broken items. All of them were much-loved pottery, and two are broken beyond repair. Last night I set about to try to fix this one: It's one of my favorite bowls by Nancy Shotola, whose pottery I've been collecting for years now. When I finished my clumsy repair, it looked like this: Yup. Bloody awful. But you know, it made me think of Kintsugi, the Japanese art of repairing ceramics with gold-infused resin, transforming them into objects even lovelier than they were before. (It's also referred to as "kintsukuroi.") hope you'll take a moment to view the photos on that site. And here is an extraordinarily beautiful song by Peter Mayer about this tradition, called Japanese Bowl. My own clumsy, non-Kintsugi repair of that bowl meant that when I tested it by filling it with water after the glue had "set" overnight, all the water ran out of the bottom immediately. Alas. Unless I can figure out a way to repair-my-repair, I will no longer be able to use the bowl for storing liquids. But that doesn't mean it can no longer be used, right? There are life metaphors aplenty here. Such as, learning to let go. Or the famous Leonard Cohen quote, "There is crack in everything. That's how the light gets in." Or the Hemingway quote from A Farewell to Arms about being strong at the broken places. (Although I think the Hemingway quote is usually taken out of context; I'm not sure that, in its original context, it has the meaning we would like to attribute to it!) Fortunately I have continued to meditate day after day, and that has undoubtedly kept me on a more even keel. But even with the support of meditation, things have been rocky. There is simply no hastening the process of transition. I have truly wonderful friends nearby. And much-loved friends from my previous location have also been coming to visit. I'm thinking of joining a chorus which rehearses only two blocks from here. And I have found a great studio space that's only a twenty-minute walk, if I can ever find the time to begin doing art again. Here's a relevant quote from Thomas Wolfe's book, You Can't Go Home Again, which encapsulates much of what I've been pondering: "You can't go back home to your family, back home to your childhood ... back home to a young man's dreams of glory and of fame ... back home to places in the country, back home to the old forms and systems of things which once seemed everlasting but which are changing all the time – back home to the escapes of Time and Memory." I've been thinking about the function of nostalgia in our lives. When is nostalgia useful? When is nostalgia an obstacle? Here is just one reason I most certainly cannot go back, even if I wished to. It's a photograph of what's underway in my old apartment. Renovation is well underway in just about every room. And that is true for me as well--renovation is definitely underway within my psyche. It's turning up a lot of grime as I break through old psychological walls and floors. There are days when I hardly recognize myself. There are days when almost every single thing I do is a "first time adventure." (Exhausting) There are days, hours, minutes, that are dark. There are storms moving through. But, there are these days as well (below): Whatever the weather, I needed to do this. To return to my original analogy about the broken bowls: I needed to shatter the container of my life and re-form it. I'm at the stage now where things are in pieces and I am just beginning to put them back together. It's disorienting, exciting, upsetting, hard, and comical. This is a stage requiring a lot of patience. I am not patient. In fact, I am highly proficient at impatience, heavily laced with whining. However, I am committed to seeing this through. As with the art of Kintsugi, If i can mix the gold with the resin here and apply it carefully, then what comes out of this should be even more lovely than what went before. Perhaps that is the one "art" that I am focusing on right now. Wish me luck. Here is a poem by Mollie Grant which says it all: Kintsugi: the Japanese Art of Golden Repair (I have not been able to reach her to get permission to print it here so I'm just directing you to her page and you can read the poem there.) And check out this short post for a wonderful poem by Lisa Cohen on Kintsugi. Lovely snow over the weekend, but oh-so-cold. As I walked through my freezing kitchen this morning I spotted this guy out my back door. I'll be thinking of him as the Snow Buddha from now on. He reminded me to make the best of things, including the chaos I'll be experiencing for the next few months. I doubt I can live up to his attitude. But I'll do my best. Meanwhile, in starting to pack yesterday I had to roll up one of the small rugs to make room for boxes. This is a tiny rug I hooked a long, long time ago. I haven't measured it in ages but I'm guessing it's something like 2.5 feet by 18". That's probably way off, but you get the idea--it's small. It's also a long-time favorite of mine. This is just a partial view of it. When I was making it, I was lucky enough to know and live relatively near to Pat Merikallio, a fabulously talented colorist, artist, and rug maker. She now lives on the West Coast, but she was kind enough to help me with the color planning and I am a forever fan of her color instincts and all her rugs. Thank you, Pat! But alas, just look at the binding. Yikes. I confess I've known for awhile that it was disintegrating and have been too lazy to address it. Once I get myself moved I will make it a priority. I may even have some of the original wool. It occurred to me as I was writing this that adjusting my attitude and "fixing things" are common themes for me. I was just reading this quote from Jack Kornfield about meditation, which has implications for both these themes: "Part of spiritual and emotional maturity is recognizing that it's not like you're going to try to fix yourself and become a different person. You remain the same person, but you become awakened." Which I certainly am not. Maybe someday? 2016 was a very tough year. No matter which "side" you were on in the brutal election season, it was tough on all of us. The results of the election devastated and terrified me, and many others, on behalf of the future of our people and our planet. But I cannot move forward or act effectively if I continue to live in this place of devastation and terror. So, my word for 2017 is: ACCEPTANCE. Now before those of you who share my political views take umbrage, please bear in mind that "ACCEPTANCE" DOES NOT IMPLY "APPROVAL" or "AGREEMENT." But if we are to take right action on any situation, we must first see the situation clearly as it is. In other words, a gray sky is gray, even if we would prefer it to be blue. The traffic jam we are caught in is indeed a traffic jam, no matter how much we'd prefer to be speeding down the highway. Do we have to like it? No. Agree with it? NO. But in order to deal with it, we have to accept that it is what is happening in this moment. That's where we are. So, now what? I've been pondering this and looking for good resources on acceptance. Tara Brach's books, like True Refuge, are on my reading list. I am observing how consistently people confuse Acceptance with Agreement. They are NOT the same. Acting from a place of denial or blind rage produces terrible results, and is one consequence of not being willing to face things "as they are" in order to choose the best possible action. I know whereof I speak. I've just spent the entire last month refusing to accept the way things are in my life. With predictably ineffective and poor results. It's time to face reality. I hasten to add that I have a l-o-n-g way to go to achieve any sort of acceptance, but I plan to be focusing on it. 2017 is going to be a challenging year for me, not just because of the election results but because I am relocating after many years in one place. I need to remember what one good friend was saying to herself yesterday: "Stay in the now. Stay in the now. Stay in the fucking NOW." (She was talking about her acceptance of her own temporary medical issue, but it applies 100% to me as well.) Anyone who knows me and has been around me lately knows how far away I am from achieving the wisdom and peace that acceptance can bring. The Buddhists have the best perspective on this, and here are some short online pieces that I have found useful. You do not have to be Buddhist to appreciate these thoughts:
1. Support yourself through the learning process 2. See things for what they really are 3. Take things less personally 4. Don’t confuse acceptance with a statement of preference 5. Get used to the way things actually are 6. See acceptance as the ability to relax around things 7. See acceptance as something you do for yourself 8. Recognise that something good comes out of acceptance 9. See challenges as part of a story that is cool in some ways 10. Recognise that flaws belong to the nature of things 11. See flaws as the price for an overall package you can accept 12. Imagine how much worse some things could have been 13. Start to laugh at things more often 14. Practise detachment from thoughts 15. Practise simple contentment with the present moment 16. Remember that nothing lasts forever I'll be focusing on Acceptance this year, which means I hope to be clearer and more effective at seeing when things need to change (and when they don't), and how best to act to change them. My meditation practice will help, and I hope my friends will feel free to remind me of this focus when I lose it. “Sometimes you just have to regret things and move on.”
― Charlaine Harris Yup, this is it. This is all that is left of my original Rainbow Lead Pencil. And I'm still using it! I've nicknamed it "Stubby." That's a dime just underneath it, for size comparison, and below that is a regular mechanical lead pencil. A friend has been asking about where to find this particular brand. Unfortunately, there is absolutely NO identifying information on the pencil at all. I wrote about my search for its exact twin HERE. It's a long, long post, but if you are very determined to get one of these, reading the entire thing may be somewhat helpful...at least to affirm that I share your frustration. (At the time I wrote that post, last August, I had ordered but not tried the Koh-i-Noor Rainbow Lead pencils. I got them and tried them later, and disliked them. I then ordered what I thought might be a match-to-my-original pencil from Oriental Trading Company, but the ones I received were very dull in color and I ended up discarding those also. Your mileage may vary, of course.) I still have no dependable information on where to get this brand of Rainbow Lead pencils. If anyone knows, please put the info in the comments! Meanwhile, have a good laugh over "Stubby," my beloved art tool. To round out my day, I took a few moments tonight to practice some new-to-me tangles and some old favorites. Because I need to get to sleep at a reasonable hour, I had to stop here and not spend any time shading - so this is line-work only. Perhaps some time in the next few days I can add the shading. This was relaxing to do and I'm hoping it will help me slide gracefully into a good night's sleep. "Sleep is the best meditation." -The Dalai Lama (Jeez, did he really say that?) Two people I greatly admire are leaving my life tomorrow. I will sorely miss them. They are flying home to another country, a country in turmoil. They were here for only a year to study, and during that year I got to know them a little. They are a young couple. They are well-educated, thoughtful, kind, and passionate about peace and freedom. When they get home, this passion will likely have a price. They are being tracked by their despotic government. They may no longer have jobs. They may be targeted, and they may even be imprisoned. I desperately hope they are safe from the moment their plane lands on their native soil, but I am not confident of it. I am not naming names or their country. Even though it's highly unlikely that this post could ever cause trouble, I would not want to create any risk by identifying them. Even if all were well in their country--and it isn't, not at all--I likely would never see them again. But now, I will not only miss them, I will worry about them from the moment they get on that plane. Things are very bad where they are going, very dangerous, and they are afraid. But they feel they must go, to work for peace. Please let them succeed, and stay safe. It takes a heart full of courage--and love--to act in accordance with their beliefs. I drew them a farewell card this morning before I left the house for the day, and left it at their door. Unfortunately I didn't photograph it before I gave it to them. So on the way home this evening I decided to duplicate it as well as I can remember. Here is my memory of the card, a tangled heart. It's really two hearts, since they are a couple with love and respect for each other. Here is a small kaleidoscopic image made from that photo. It has elements of a mandala that I will use to meditate on, while they are flying home. Stay safe, and work for peace. Stay safe, and work for peace. Stay safe, and work for peace. I will miss you. Even just looking at that tile encourages me to take a deep breath and relax. This next one is busier but was equally fun to create. This morning I stumbled across an excellent post on meditation and people's misconceptions about it. It's quite short and is by Arnie Kozak, a guest blogger on the wonderful Susan Cain's site; you can read it here. He really touches on the most common assumption about meditation--that it's about "stopping the mind." It isn't. But drawing frequently does stop my mind and pulls me into total absorption on the one line that I am drawing in this moment. Thus, meditation and drawing serve the same purpose in different ways for me. "Art enables us to find ourselves and lose ourselves at the same time."
--Thomas Merton This was the last tile I created on my peaceful day of tangling (see Part 1 for more info about that). I loved the way this came out. Once again I was in a room with over 100 people and deeply appreciated the total silence while we all focused on our tiles. You may recognize elements of the photo above in the photo below. That's because I took the photo above and ran it through an iPhone app and created this mandala: "Each person’s life is like a mandala – a vast, limitless circle. We stand in the center of our own circle, and everything we see, hear and think forms the mandala of our life." - Pema Chodron And then I used another app and came up with this: While I'm drawing or tangling, time seems totally irrelevant. In that moment, there is no time, just breath. Just focus. Just being. This is the essence of meditation, surely. “The whole culture is telling you to hurry, while the art tells you to take your time. Always listen to the art.” ~Junot Diaz Long ago and far away...or so it seems...I spent an entire day drawing. Ahhhhhhhh... In reality, it was recently and not that far away. But I have traveled such a distance interior-ly between then and now. What I am referring to: I had a chance to sit and tangle for an entire day a couple of weeks ago, and experienced all the benefits: the inner silence, the lovely calm focus, the lack of worry about outcome, and the great sense of peace and timelessness. All these things can also come from meditation, although since meditation (vipassana) invites us to turn towards and become aware of whatever is present, there are frequent times when meditation asks us to sit with difficult feelings or sensations. A very wise process, though sometimes a turbulent one. The only difference I find between drawing/tangling and classical meditation is the incredible focus that drawing evokes, and how that focus prevents me from being aware of anything else. Sometimes this is more useful than meditation. Since that one lovely peaceful day of drawing, life has ramped up and things are, at the moment, confusing and unsettled. I am sitting with this in meditation and just observing that. But clearly there is a place for both practices in my life, meditation and drawing, during times like this. Both feel as precious to me as breathing, and both lead me to clearer perspective and inner peace. Each method works in its own way. Every day I meditate. But so far, I have not mastered the practice of daily drawing or tangling. I see the benefits of both, and I always make time for meditation. But too often I do not make time for drawing. Instead I pay bills, or work, run irrelevant errands, or knit while watching television. Or--although this is nearly as beneficial--I work on designing, dyeing for, or hooking my latest rug. Rug hooking is incredibly meditative. But it still doesn't have the effect on me that drawing does, and the past couple of weeks have proved to me how true that is. I frequently feel I want to draw, but tell myself that other tasks are more important. But are they? Life is complicated. Drawing, breathing, seeing, following just that one line at a time, is so very simple. Perspective in drawing...perspective in life. The viewer of art can go into a kind of meditation, a bit of a different sense or feeling. - Dorthe Eisenhardt I believe that painting should come through the avenues of meditation rather than the canals of action. - Mark Tobey This piece was done quite literally in a moving meditation with 120 other people. You could have heard a pin drop in the room. And below is another piece I did for a challenge project. I used a white gellyroll pen and a gold metallic pen. Underneath here, you can see a photo of what a few other participants did with the same challenge--look at the differences. I love that. I wish I had a photo of the entire grouping of these--I'm betting the final collection had at least 60 tiles in it, each one different.
I cranked up the Motown today while alternately standing and sitting to punch the rug, and was it ever fun! (If the above video doesn't play when you click on it, just click on the "view on YouTube button and another window will open and play it. You can listen and read at the same time.) Martha Reeves (and the Vendellas) was one of my idols back in the day. Then there were all the other great songs... "Dancing in the Streets," "Rescue Me," "I Heard It On the Grapvine," "R-e-s-p-e-c-t," "Up on the Roof..." OMG, dance, dance, dance. Even when sitting down. How I miss Motown. Thus, there will be an odd mix of Motown, assorted dharma talks, meditations, and the very long and wonderful George Eliot book Middlemarch (which I finished listening to a couple of weeks ago) woven into the fibers of this rug. (Good mojo, I'm thinking.) Tomorrow is likely to be very rainy and it might feel good to stay home and play with color. I may stay home to dye more yarn. Below are two views of the rug progress, plus a new tangle that I threw in at the very end. A quick look at the back side of the rug, close up. And here is the front. I spent 5 hours at the studio today and got a chunk more done. I am slowly moving toward being halfway finished with this very large rug (but am not there yet, not by any means). It's beginning to be hard to move it on the frame. An experiment with some tangles. I had fun with this last night. I SHOULD be doing my taxes. Ugh. I AM doing some tangling, which I have sorely missed... I enjoyed doing this, although perhaps didn't do such a great job on shading. And that's just fine, since it's been so long since I've done any tangling at all I'm happy with whatever I produce at this point. Gotta start somewhere. Oh my gawd does it feel good to be drawing, again. So meditative. Rug progress: What can't be grasped in this photo is the actual size of what I've done. This small-looking section is nearly the size of a regular hooked rug already. (Most hooked rugs are about 2' x 3') Before I realized this, I was beginning to flag, thinking that I hadn't accomplished much. But then when I spread out the rug today, I remembered what a huge piece this is going to be, and ended up being quite impressed by how much I've gotten done. If I were making a regular sized rug, I would nearly be finished. I am guessing I am only about 1/5th done, if that. I've been listing to dharma talks and meditations as I punch. While I cannot do the meditations in classic fashion while I work on the rug, listening to them emphasizes the meditative nature of rug hooking/rug punching. The rhythmic nature of this art lends itself perfectly to tranquility and mindfulness. How lucky am I, to be able to spend my time this way? "...illumines this world like the moon freed from a cloud...'
The Dhammapada I was recently away for seven days on another lovely, extraordinary silent meditation retreat at IMS in Barre. When I returned, I still had four posts to write in order to finish chronicling the Tarot Rug Project. Finally I got that done--it felt so good to complete. Since then, I've needed to catch my breath and catch up with the rest of my life. This week I finally got back to the studio, and began to sort out how I'm going to handle this gigantic (for me it's gigantic, 3' x 6') Moon Runner, also known as the Moon and Clouds rug. I dyed all the background (and blogged about it here and here, as well as in a few other posts). Got all that done back in November, but I hadn't tried out the test colors I dyed for the moon or clouds. So in the last three days, I've done some experimenting. Here was my first try at a cloud: I kind of liked it, but wasn't convinced. What was it missing?...it seemed too dull to me. But I beavered on, and today I tackled one of the moons: ...and finally got most--not all--of it done: ...and now, yes, the cloud is definitely too dull. But I think I'm loving the moon! And the cloud is very fixable; it just needs more yellow. Am not certain how the moon will look against the background, but there is only one way to find out. More work on this tomorrow. I am getting WAY excited about this rug. This is the twenty-fourth post in a series on the Tarot Rug Project (also known as "Exploring the Tarot: 23 Artists Hook the Major Arcana"). To view other rugs in the series, go HERE (that post will be kept up to date as new photos are published and the show travels). THE WORLD: Here is the "classic" Rider-Waite-Smith image: "We are part of this universe; we are in this universe, but perhaps more important than both of those facts, is that the universe is in us." Neil deGrasse Tyson "When we try to pick out anything by itself, we find it hitched to everything else in the universe." John Muir "To the mind that is still, the whole universe surrenders." Lao Tzu This is the last of the Major Arcana, and I am the artist who created the interpretation of the card in the following rug. (This isn't the last rug, though--we still have one more rug to go!) Are you thinking I went off-road with this interpretation? You'd be absolutely right; I did. There is nothing left from the original card in this design. Or is there? In fact, if you look closely, you will see that every single Major Arcana card is represented on this rug, in the form of the Tiny Tarot, published by U.S. Games Systems, Inc., of Stamford CT (USA). I'd like to thank them for allowing me to use their copyrighted images directly on my rug and also for allowing me to copy their Universal Waite Tarot for use in this blog throughout my posts on the tarot project. If you are having trouble seeing what I mean, here's a closer look: This rug is--if I'm right--the only punched rug in the entire project. There are a few traditionally hooked loops in there, but 98% of the rug was punched with yarn and an Oxford punch needle. (Thank you, Amy Oxford and Heidi Whipple of The Oxford Rug Hooking School) What's the design about? It's a diagram of The Universe (another name for The World card) called the Qabala. [There are various spellings of that word: "Kabbalah" and others, but I'm going with the Q-one.] Below is the story of this rug, and I'm sticking to it...it begins with my love for the tarot and ends with my love for both tarot and rug hooking: I began working with the tarot in the 1970s, using it not for fortune-telling but rather as a reflection of the psyche, and I have been learning from its wisdom ever since. Because The World is usually regarded as the final card in the Major Arcana, I wanted to create an image for this rug that would integrate all of the rugs that preceded it—thereby tying the exhibit together. The Tree of Life (also called the Qabala) portrayed on this rug is an esoteric diagram of The World—not just this world, but all the visible and invisible worlds in existence. The esoteric Qabala/Tree of Life is a many-layered framework and has, since the 19th century, been associated with tarot. The twenty-two cards of the Major Arcana have been matched to the twenty-two paths between the spheres on the Tree. In the rug, I have placed the cards on the Tree in their commonly accepted positions, as a way of summarizing and integrating the Arcana for this exhibit. I hand-dyed all of the blue background yarns for the rug, and used bits and pieces of other leftover hand-dyed yarns to duplicate the traditional colors of the spheres on the Tree. As I mentioned above, I used an Oxford Company punch needle for the punching process. A few loops on the rug were also pulled using the traditional rug hooking method. In a post I wrote last year--before I was given permission to publicly speak about this project (it was still in the hush-hush phase), I described the fun I had at Amy's school in a class with Heidi, learning to dye the variegated background for the rug. You can read that post here (it is cryptic because it was pre-publicity for the project, but you'll get the idea). Here are two of the stops I made along the way to creating the rug. In the first, you can see my initial drawing of the outline on monk's cloth (I ended up re-doing the font on the title at the bottom), and then on the right you can see the color-planning in progress. One of the many reasons I love making textile art is that the process is so often entirely meditative. Forming loop after loop is rhythmic and calming—a type of moving meditation. I have had a committed meditation practice for many years and appreciate this opportunity to maintain a mindful state while creating art.
WHAT DOES THE CARD MEAN? This card shows the World Dancer, inside a double circle of protection--the four animals at the outside edges represent the 4 archangels, the 4 elements, and all the other symbology of "four-ness." We have seen these four in another card--card ten, the Wheel of Fortune. Just outside of the Dancer is a green, vital, bursting-with-life wreath, a type of ouroboros, with its red sash in the form of an infinity symbol. She holds two wands, and her legs are in similar position to the Hanged Man, but she is facing up, as he was facing down. The position of her legs also suggests that she is dancing. This is the Fool, come full circle. S/he has completed the journey, and it has been very successful. It's time to stop and dance--to pause awhile and look back, as she seems to be doing, to assess where you have been. Only then can you assess where you are going next, as the journey never ends. Synthesis a good keyword for this card. Another message of this card might be that you have all the resources you need to move forward; just open your eyes to the many options that surround you. When you get this card: As with each of the other cards, if you choose The World card in response to a topic you are pondering, it will have many meanings that all share a similar theme. Ask yourself the following questions if you get this card. One of them will apply to your topic—a little message from your subconscious to your conscious self.
Only one more rug is left in our tarot rug project series, the rug that is the design for the back of the deck we have created together. That's coming up in the next post. Curious about the rest of the rugs in the exhibit? You can see all the posts by clicking on the link at the very top of this post. There is a Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ) section here (NOTE: scroll down to the bottom of that post to get to the FAQ). Thanks for reading. Your comments are always welcome. The Diva Challenge #245 this week is on Hollibaugh. Oh, how I love this tangle. I know there will be some fabulous renditions of it, so please click on that link and treat yourself to what others have done. Here is my quick version (on the left), very different from what I usually do. And to round off the Hollibaugh celebration, here is the same tangle done by several first-time students, below. I had only 7 minutes to teach this tangle in a meditation class (all the students were training to be meditation teachers): You can see the meditation chimes on the left. I do love Hollibaugh. Not bad for seven minutes of coaching. We were focused on the meditative aspect of the tangle. And now on to the BIG YARN DYEING PROJECT, Day 2. Life is full of surprises and today is no exception. I will only get 3 skeins done today. My goal is six, but...not gonna happen. Much busyness with other people. And my car is in the shop. (Praying to the god of cars that it is an inexpensive fix) Plus, I have an afternoon commitment. I will end up dyeing yarn tonight, just to produce the third skein. As I write this in the early afternoon, I've just taken two out of the oven. So here are some photos of the process: ...and some of the results: And of course, no dyeing process would be complete without what's in this last photo below. At least--that's true for me. I am apparently a dyeing slob. I get dye all over my hands, despite wearing good rubber gloves. It's a mystery how I do this; other people come out with pristine hands, but mine are always gross at the end. (No, the gloves do not leak. It's definitely something I am doing...but what?) Without this stuff, I wouldn't be able to go out in public for days afterwards. Legend has it that Pearl McGown, the diva and doyenne of rug hooking in the 1950s, used to dye wool while dressed in an evening gown to demonstrate that it could be done without being messy. (NOTE: She is an entire story to herself--she singlehandedly kept rug hooking going in the U.S., but she was quite the dictator.)
Hey, if I owned an evening gown, I too could dye wool while wearing it without getting spots on it. I never get dye on my clothes either. But I note that the legend of Pearl Dyeing in Her Evening Gown says nothing about her HANDS. Perhaps they were blue up to the elbows when she finished. Mine are all colors when I am done. Long live ReDuRan. (No, I don't get a commission.) The tangle challenge from the Diva this week was a brand-new tangle called "Gourdgeous." I was not too interested in this tangle when it was published. And now, having drawn it twice, I'm still not enamored. But hey, these things sometimes change with practice. Perhaps in a few months I'll view it differently. After all, I didn't like meditation at first, either, and now I'm 40 years into it, still "practicing," and although it's as challenging as it ever was, I certainly am reaping the benefits. But I don't see myself doing this particular tangle for the next 40 years, even with more practice. Even though Zentangle® is a form of moving meditation, some tangles increase the meditative experience, and some don't. Which tangle works or doesn't work to increase Zentangle's meditative aspect differs from person to person, which is one of the interesting things about the technique...just like different types of meditation work for different people. Neither process is "one size fits all.") Here is Gourdgeous, drawn in my Tangle-a-Day calendar. Since Maria Thomas (my idol) came to this tangle by simply using lines and spaces, I thought I'd add a few lines and spaces behind it. This was my first-ever attempt: For the actual challenge, I put it on a black tile, using Signo Uniball pens (broad and narrow), a General White Charcoal Pencil, and a Rainbow Lead Pencil. So here you see attempt #2: Meh.
I'll try additional practice with it, both black and white and in color, to see what develops. Right now I'm going over to the Diva's page to see what other folks have done with this. Usually I don't look until after I've submitted my own work so as not to be influenced, but this time I've accidentally seen a couple of the submissions on other people's blogs, and they are truly stunning. Looking forward to seeing what everyone else did. SHORT RANT: please indulge me. Listening to today's podcast from the Mindfulness Summit, I heard people thanking each other endlessly. In fact, I've noticed this phenomenon in every one of the podcasts, and I notice it everywhere on the street and in all conversations wherever I go. Now, saying "thank you" is a basic life skill--reflecting awareness of all our reasons for gratitude, and then expressing our thanks to someone who has been kind to us. I'm totally into it. I'm not trying to change that; I'd like to see more people saying thanks. Until, that is, it becomes an endless loop. No one seems able to end these conversations, which run along the lines of: "Thank you so much," (Person A), to which Person B responds, "And thank YOU for (fill in the blank)," to which Person A replies, "Oh, but really, what you have done is just so amazing I can't thank you enough..." and on and on it goes. I catch myself doing this all the time--and hear others doing it consistently. I never hear the "other response," EVER, anymore. Could someone please, please, just take responsibility when thanked, for just replying, "You're welcome." ??? End of the exchange! It's almost as though we are afraid to be thanked. Afraid of someone else's gratitude. Afraid of being a Giver, and insistent on being the Recipient. It's politeness reduced to mindless phrases, rather than a sincere meaningful exchange. Just say, "You're welcome," for heaven's sake! (I am addressing myself, as well as anyone else who cares to read this.) OK, END OF RANT. Thanks for listening. (Assuming you did.) And your response would be... "You're welcome." Phew. On a less cranky and picky note: I walked to the studio today to get myself out and moving, plus to drop off something for my studio roommate. Once I got there I couldn't bring myself to just leave, so I put in another hour on the rug and finished the second long border. Yippee! Now I have the two short borders to do, and then the final outside narrow border.
Next the finishing begins. What's involved? Steaming the rug. Cutting away the extra fabric. Zig-zagging around the edge so that it won't unravel. Then binding it by hand. A final thorough steaming. Lastly, making and attaching a label. So there is still plenty of work ahead. I love watching it take shape! |
ABOUT ME I'm a textile artist (traditional rug hooking, punch needle rug hooking, and other textile arts), a long-time meditator, a certified meditation teacher and coach, and focused on learning about the interplay of art, creativity, and mindfulness every day. Categories
All
Archives
March 2024
|